Our greatest enemies are ourselves.

Ruiz states that, because of our internal belief systems, upheld by the Book of Law, the inner Judge, and the inner Victim, we are both our first and worst enemies. Because of our beliefs, we pass judgment on ourselves every day for our mistakes, and as a result, reject ourselves. A major part of this rejection is the ideal of perfection that we create and believe that we should be able to meet, all in service of gaining the attention and approval of others. However, this ideal is an impossible standard to meet, and thus we can never achieve it because it requires us to pretend to be something other than who we are. This self-rejection causes us to anticipate that others will reject us too, before we even give them a chance to, and thus we accept those rejections. 

Ruiz argues that we do not accept from others what we have not already accepted from ourselves. For example, we will only allow others to harm and judge us as much as we harm and judge ourselves, because our self-rejection leads us to believe that we deserve it. Not only does this cause us suffering, but it also limits our ability to live our lives to the fullest as we learn to please people and live for others instead of ourselves. We become obsessed with past mistakes, preventing us from living in the present, and we take actions not because we want to, but to avoid punishment or to receive a reward from others. In this way, we are denying ourselves the freedom to be who we are and live our lives as we want.

Your mind will only accept what it is willing to receive.

Ruiz uses a metaphor of the mind as fertile ground in order to convey this idea. Our minds are fertile soil. What they are fertile for, and what they are willing to receive, is entirely our own decision. Most individuals’ minds, Ruiz claims, are open to seeds of fear, leading them to accept ideas that confirm their fear of rejection and other negative emotions stemming from it, including hate and anger. These seeds of fear may be as simple as information given to us growing up, such as the idea of what is wrong and right, or others’ opinions of us, such as comments on our looks or intelligence. When we agree with this information, we believe it, and allow the seeds of fear to sprout. These agreements will remain with us as part of our beliefs until the agreements are broken, causing suffering. 

In contrast, when we only open our minds to love, then only seeds of love will take root. Instead of self-rejection, we will have self-acceptance, and we will be able to uphold the Four Agreements. When we only accept love, Ruiz states, then we are immune to negativity and the harm around us, especially because we are able to uphold the Second Agreement—“Don’t take anything personally.” We understand that others are not acting because of us, but because of themselves and their own point of view, and we are able to see that we are only responsible for our own actions. Thus, we do not judge ourselves for the actions of others or trust in their negativity. 

Performing actions with love is the key to life to the fullest.

In Chapter 5, Ruiz states “Action is about living fully. Inaction is the way that we deny life.” However, simply performing actions is not enough to live fully. The way we take action determines whether or not we gain fulfillment from them and whether we are truly living in the present. People must perform an action not because they feel like they have to, or for a reward at the end, but because they want to perform the action, and to do their best while performing it. 

Ruiz uses the example of working only for a paycheck. Those who work solely for the paycheck in sight at the end of the week will only suffer through the action, forever stuck looking ahead to the future instead of being engaged in the present, and will struggle, not being able to do their best. They will then not enjoy their days off, because they are regretting their past days dedicated to work, and will only be attempting to escape that misery instead of living fully in the present. However, when people perform an action for the action’s sake, and with a feeling of love for life and the world around them, they will find enjoyment in even the most mundane of activities because they love their life. They will not be stuck thinking of the future or looking back on the past with regret but instead will be able to live fully in the present while doing their best every day.

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