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There could have been no two hearts so open, no tastes so similar, no feelings so in unison, no countenances so beloved. Now they were strangers; nay, worse than strangers, for they could never become acquainted. It was a perpetual estrangement.
Anne and Wentworth’s conflict through most of the novel hinges on the distance eight years has put between them. When Wentworth returns to Uppercross, Anne laments that their unpleasant history will keep them from getting to know each other again. She reflects on this awkward separation at the first dinner she and Wentworth both attend in Uppercross. Anne listens to him talk about his travels at sea, and she reminisces that she would once have been at the center of his conversation. Even as Wentworth becomes a fixture of Uppercross society, Anne learns about his feelings mostly secondhand or by overhearing him talking to someone else. As this quote from Chapter 8 indicates, her intimate connection with Wentworth is gone. They make polite conversation when they need to, but they cannot properly reconnect until the very end of the novel.
So ended all danger to Anne of meeting Captain Wentworth at Kellynch Hall, or of seeing him in company with her friend.
The narrator of Persuasion repeatedly emphasizes how Lady Russell and Captain Wentworth are the only two people besides Anne’s late mother who genuinely care about Anne. However, as Lady Russell is the one who persuaded Anne not to marry Wentworth, the two of them understandably do not get along. One of the challenges Anne must deal with throughout the novel is rekindling her relationship with Wentworth without offending Lady Russell. Eight years ago, Anne chose Lady Russell’s counsel over Wentworth’s promises, but she refuses to choose between them now. Instead, as this passage from Chapter 13 suggests, she does her best to keep her social circle with Lady Russell separate from her circle with Wentworth.
An every-day Mrs. Smith, of all people and all names in the world, to be the chosen friend of Miss Anne Elliot, and to be preferred by her to her own family connections among the nobility of England and Ireland!
The Elliots prioritize their reputation and connections in society over almost everything else, so they keep themselves firmly separate from any associations with lower classes. Instead, the Elliots do their best to add people who elevate their social standing. Anne, however, has no trouble associating with people who would be considered below her station, as Sir Walter observes in this passage from Chapter 17. Indeed, Anne is happy to venture out of her social class to meet with Mrs. Smith. She would rather not be an acquaintance of the high-status Dalrymples because Anne thinks they have no substance. This distinction separates Anne even further from her family than she had been before, reinforcing a sense that they continue to associate with her only because she is related to them.
[Elizabeth] felt that Mrs. Musgrove and all her party ought to be asked to dine with them, but she could not bear to have the difference of style, the reduction of servants, which a dinner must betray, witnessed by those who had been always so inferior to the Elliots of Kellynch.
One factor of the social boundaries and divisions in Persuasion is the maintaining of impressions. As the narrator reports in Chapter 12, Elizabeth is willing to host the Musgroves and Harvilles in her house, but she will not offer them the hospitality due to close friends because she does not want them to know how much money the Elliots have lost. Elizabeth and Sir Walter have only a modest home and a modest staff, but they see themselves as superior to the financially stable Musgroves. By insisting that the Musgroves can only come for tea, Elizabeth maintains the illusion of the Elliots’ superiority.
To see you . . . in the midst of those who could not be my well-wishers; to see your cousin close by you, conversing and smiling, and feel all the horrible eligibilities and proprieties of the match!
Wentworth addresses these words to Anne in Chapter 23, on the night of the concert where they first reconnect after eight years. Wentworth knows he is not popular with Anne’s family and that his presence creates tension. This tension affects him, making him feel jealous and frustrated about being separated from Anne’s group. Even worse, Mr. Elliot, a suitor the family obviously approves of, is part of that group. When Wentworth compares himself with Mr. Elliot, he can see that Mr. Elliot has the clear advantage.
