“I could not even cry in his presence for fear he would take the moment over, pit his grief against mine in a competition of who loved her more, and who had more to lose.”

Michelle writes these words about her father towards the end of Chapter 7, when she admits to feeling disappointed in her father during the course of her mother’s illness; she resents his weakness in the face of disaster, and his shameless demand for her support. In being unable to cry in front of him, she shows that she is aware of his emotional fragility, and anticipates that his grief will cause him to be toxic and confrontational rather than supportive. This quote works to characterize Michelle’s unsteady relationship with her father, and foreshadows their own separation after her mother’s death. Michelle’s bitterness towards her father and his constant reliance on her emotional consistency ultimately drive them apart, and it begins here, as the severity of her mother’s condition sets in.